Me being braggy

Okay, so my prof wrote me a glowing letter of recommendation. And I just had to share it:

April 2009
To Whom It May Concern:

I am writing this letter as an evaluation of Ms. Jessica Barton’s work while on assistantship through the School of Library and Information Studies at the University ********** I supervised Ms. Barton in the ******** Library from January, 2008 to April, 2009. While on assistantship, Ms. Barton provided service at our reference desk for four to six hours each week, and carried out collection development and other projects outside of her desk work. As her supervisor, I recommend Ms. Barton for the reference position at ______ University Library because she has displayed outstanding people skills, acquired searching and collections experience, shown a potential to meet professional activity requirements, and expressed the user-oriented attitude necessary to succeed in academic library work.

In terms of her reference service, Ms. Barton’s natural talents and acting experience have given her an exceptional ability to work with the public; she already has a well-developed professional demeanor. She has demonstrated excellent communication skills during reference interviews and in other venues. Articulateness, friendliness, effective use of nonverbal cues, and an enthusiastic attitude are all features of her service. Students like her. When she is helping someone, she is tenacious in her searches, helping the patron get started at their workstation, then searching more at the Information Desk, and returning to the patron with additional search suggestions. She is someone I am glad that the library has on its front lines. In addition to reference work, I believe she would make a great teacher in your library’s instruction program.

Ms. Barton participated in a weekly reference training program for graduate assistants, and proved to be a fast learner. Our training covered Voyager, Ebscohost, Proquest, and other major search interfaces. Ms. Barton has applied herself to her training, performed well on our database tests, and developed practical search skills with many of the same resources that your library owns.

I would also like to share assessments from one of my colleagues about Ms. Barton’s reference work. We use the Reference and User Services Association’s “Guidelines for Behavioral Performance of Reference Professionals” as the benchmarks for evaluating our graduate assistants, and Ms. Barton received high marks. In terms of open comments, my colleague added that “Jessica has been as asset to the GIS desk this Spring Semester. She is very dependable…she will be an excellent librarian when she completes the program.” Ms. Barton is communicative and polite in her interactions with other employees as well as diligent in her duties. Pleased with her performance this spring, my department has hired her as a student worker for the summer.

Ms. Barton also conducted work in collections. Knowing that she has a bachelor’s degree in history, I was delighted to have her help me select books for this field. She first developed a conspectus that I found to be well-targeted to the Department of History’s curriculum and research interests. She then selected over $300 of new monographs through the Blackwell Collection Manager database, choosing titles that were relevant and scholarly. In addition to purchasing new materials, Ms. Barton helped me screen a donation of 80-100 books. Building on this experience, she attended a selectors’ meeting with me that included Blackwell representatives who showcased their new database and talked with librarians about selection issues. Also in the area of collections work, Ms. Barton conducted an inventory project of the reference stacks this semester. As described by one of the staff members, “this project consisted of working with Shelf Lister lists, making sure items were in correct order on the shelves, looking at call number labels and barcodes to make sure they were legible and intact, and pulling items that needed to be sent to cataloging for one reason or another.” Ms. Barton thus has real world experience with collections, and has the capacity to carry out meticulous, behind-the-scenes kinds of work like stacks management in addition to working well with patrons at a reference desk, as well as apply the critical thinking skills necessary to evaluate and select materials for a library.

Ms. Barton also represented the Libraries in a spectacular way at University Day, a campus wide outreach event for prospective students and their parents. Each department sets up a display booth advertising their services, and posts staff members at the booth to answer questions from visitors. Once again, I could observe how her stage experience enhances her library work, as she was very confident and proactive about greeting the students and parents, making a wonderful impression on the visitors. She could almost instantly build rapport with visitors and kindle their interest in library services.

In terms of potential to meet tenure requirements, Ms. Barton coauthored a poster session, ******* that she presented at the ****** Library Association conference in April, 2009. She and her coauthors distributed a survey to their fellow students about career motivations, and created graphs and handouts with the results. The poster was well-received: visiting librarians took over thirty handouts and followed-up after the conference. For example, the head of a reference department at another library made a point of emailing Ms. Barton a commendation after the conference, and noted that she planned to use the poster information in her work. Ms. Barton’s poster reflects her ability to work well in a team as well as her commitment to the library profession. I know that your library requires professional contributions as part of its tenure requirements, and Ms. Barton’s presentation of a poster while still in library school provides evidence of her potential to meet these requirements.

The primary reason that I recommend Ms. Barton for a reference position, however, is that she has a user-oriented attitude. She has a genuine interest in helping people.

I have no reservations about recommending Ms. Barton for the position. Overall, I would characterize Ms. Barton as a motivated, people-focused, and intelligent new librarian. She has worked hard to gain practical experience in her field. Most of the skills that she has developed at ****** Library are readily transferrable to your library, and her people skills are applicable in any library setting. Most importantly, she keeps patrons paramount in her work. I will be happy to answer any questions that you might have about Ms. Barton.

My Ideal Man…Not What You Think

I was inspired to do this by another friend and also the many MANY many books I read on relationships and finding your ideal mate. And guess what, I am NOT going to make a list of my ideal man’s qualities. Why you might ask? Because God knows what I need. Sure He and I both know what I “want” but only God knows what I need. And I truly believe that I will get what I need. However, One time, my friend asked me what are some of the qualities you want in a husband. And i laughed because I had done it all before I had made a three page (front and back) list of my “ideal man” hahaha, needless to say it has gotten lost and i am so glad it did. So know, you wanna know what my list is….pay close attention:

1.) Christian — fairly strong but not perfect. In fact, imperfect would be preferred.

2.) Honest — You can tell me you drowned kittens as a teenager. You can tell you got 50 girls pregnant. you can tell me that you have gambled your life savings away. I’ll try not to hold that against you. But if you EVER, and I do mean EVER lie to me, it will be very hard for me to forgive you (even though i will try) and it will be very impossible for me to respect you. Okay, this might be a little extreme. And it really is a matter of extremes. Like if you lie to me about your favorite food, just because you know I like that food…fine. Or if you want to protect me from something pretty minor, like you think my butt has gotten too big. Yeah, keep that tidbit to yourself. But if you lie to me about major life stuff and you do it more than once, you can just go ahead and pack your bags.

3.) Smart — obvious, no?

4.) Calm, organized and reserved — Because I think this will compliment me very well.

Other than these four things, I don’t want much else. Oh, except for him to be a little bit taller than me. I’m 5′9 so that might be a problem

This has been a glorious semester…minus the whole school thing

I wonder when I will stop measuring time according to semester? Haha. You know, we (us students) continue to consider time as “semesters.” It’s kinda of funny.

But anyway, back to why this has been a glorious semester. Except for school (which makes the title very ironic),  it probably has been the best  four months of my life. I have started hanging out with some new people, I don’t have to kill myself by working at a semi-full time job and writing massive research papers (even though I do miss it majorly), and I’ve gotten closer to my mom which has been a blessing. And I have finally figured out how to deal with my dad. Which is a major MAJOR thing in my life.

But most importantly, I have finally learned some things about myself and achieved somethings that I never thought I would. But there are two

1.) Confidence –  If you had seen me at Chick-Fil-A Trussville No. I haven’t become confident. I haven’t started feeling confident. But instead, I have realized that I have been confident along. Simply, I wasn’t confident in my confidence. I thought I didn’t have confidence. I thought I was insecure. I thought I was this timid, meek and mild young thing. But really sometimes I am too confident. I think i was too afraid of being confident because I worried that that would make me a conceited person. So I did the complete opposite. But what I have realized, even though I do have my moments of insecurity (just like anybody), I’m generally a very confident person who knows what she wants in life and I shouldn’t be afraid of acting that way.  And that’s just not about my personality either. That’s my looks as well. I’m pretty. I shouldn’t be afraid to admit this. True, I am no supermodel and I have my bodily flaws but you know what? So does everyone. What I should do is dress the way that makes me feel the most confident and that is when I feel the sexiest. So I have discovered the beauty of confidence.

2.) I’ve realized the importance of independence. Ask me five or six years ago, when I would want to get married OR get into a serious relationship, I would have told you “right now. if any guy ask me out, I will say yes and will gladly stay with him until he asks me to marry him.” I didn’t even value my independence or the lessons I was learning along the way. Now, I am reveling in my independence. i love the adventures and the freedom I have and that I have had because I have been independent. And now, if you ask me when I want to get married, I’ll promptly answer “Um, well, at the very least a year and a half.” Why you might ask? Well, I have decided that I am going to need six months to an entire year to be independent financially from my parents and from school. I am going to prove to myself that I can provide financially for myself, and that I can also structure my time without school or my other responsibilities demanding me to structure myself (i’m pretty sure that made no sense but whatev) Also I want to be able to clean and cook without my parents requiring it of me. No, I will not do it perfectly. I will mess up. But i would rather mess up with only myself to have to worry about then with a family depending on me. Plus, I want to live in New Orleans and that isn’t really a place that I want to raise my children.

It’s really been a learning about myself semester, but not in a artsy fartsy way but in a “uh-duh, Jessica, that was so obvious” way. I wasn’t in like a soul-searching mood ever but, like most things in my life, it just struck me out of the blue. Such is my life at this current moment.

Update on the suitcase situation

Okay, so it wasn’t a bomb. *sigh of relief* but still it was kinda of creepy and random. Since we did the library become a luggage drop off?

Longest Day of My Life

So this isn’t a really insightful post but really just a random observation of my life sitting at the library’s reference desk.

I’ll make a list cause that is just easier for me:

1.) No matter where I go, the crazy people always follow me. I’m not even kidding. It is like a sign is hanging over me that says “Homeless? Crazy? Or just plain odd? See Jessica.” Other employees get normal questions but I get the obscure lady from New York who wants to find a poem, even though she doesn’t know what it is or who wrote it. But thankfully, Google is amazing.

2.) The Internet is the devil. That’s all I want to say about that.

3.) It can actually be exciting at the library. When I walked into work, I saw people protesting a senator who was speaking at the library today. That was fun. And right now some librarians are discussing remodeling the reference desk area. And one of them has a large bump on his bald head. That’s not meant to sound mean…just stating a fact.

4.) And I just had to walk away from my desk and I left this blog up and the bald guy with a bump on his head was definitely standing right in front of my computer screen. Eek.

5.) I work with the stereotypical scene/hippie/emo girl. She’s nice but definitely the stereotype
And NOW she is chatting about moving in with her boyfriend.

6.) The most random and weird things happen to me. Like this hotel employee just left a suitcase by my desk because he said one of the guests is at the library and needs to come downstairs and pick it up. Geez. I hope it isn’t a bomb…it might be ticking.

I’ll let you know if it explodes…

Perception vs. Reality

Okay, so here I am doing my weekly update of the ole blog-o-roni.
I was thinking the other day (shocking, I know) about how our perception of ourselves are not always reality. In fact, they could be far off the mark. And this isn’t just for those who are conceited about themselves and think they are “all that” but it can also apply to people who have a negative perception of themselves or just a neutral perception.
So my question is, who is your real self? Is it the one that you perceive yourself to be? Or is it the one that everyone sees you as. Not the role you assume but you, in your natural state and personality.

Like last night, I was talking with a friend and we were talking about our goals and fears. I said that I often considered myself a very weak and fearful person who didn’t take risks. But my friend just said, “Yeah, you are way off on that perception.” That made me think…huh…maybe my perception isn’t reality. Maybe I don’t know everything and maybe I have a wrong perception of myself. I don’t know. Just trying to figure it all out.

Curiosity and Library Science

I was told today that I possess a “curiosity about the world.” Well, first that compliment just blew me out of the water. That thought had passed my mind but I never really thought my curiosity was any different than anybody elses.  But after that was said, I consider what they had said and realized that it was true. And THAT is what is causing my problems with library school.

I’m not trying to be negative but I really dislike this program. I’m not learning anything that fascinates me or challenges me. It’s dry. It’s not hard. I don’t have to apply myself to learn anything new. I just have to do the tasks. And these tasks don’t teach me anything new.

All that said, I’m going to keep at it because in life you HAVE to do somethings that you don’t like, especially if the end result is better than the process. Because even though I dislike my classes, I do not dislike the profession. I love helping people discover new information. I love learning about new things within the profession. And if classes were more like the profession, then I probably would love it more. I wish I could fast forward through the next eight months and receive my Masters.

Ten Things Guy Friends Can Teach You:

After my deep and serious post, I decided to add some humor to my weekly-ish blog post.

10.) Some of them are just as obsessed with relationships as girls are.

9.) There are more butt-guys then there are boob-guys, according to statistics.

8.) It’s a fact…they are better drivers

7.) But we can write better papers

6.) The things girls worry about and the things guys worry about are slightly different

5.) They don’t see female flaws nearly as much as you think they do.

4.) If a girl team and a guy team compete at beer pong…the guys WILL win.

3.) But we will beat them in trivia

2.) Anything…and i do mean A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G…can be turned into a “that’s what she said” comment.

1.) Everyone is different…that’s what makes life interesting.

Friends teach you things…

Since late Jan/early Feb, I’ve been hanging out with some really awesome people. They have really taught me some great things and I think I have grown positively since hanging out with them.
The two biggest things I have learned are that people are truly different, and that open communication is the most important thing in trusting people.

For being such an extroverted person, I have an incredibly intricate and complicated thought life. I can overthink things and it takes forever to turn off my inner monologue. In fact, it’s become such a everyday aspect of my life that I wouldn’t know what to do without it. I usually start thinking about things a lot. Unfortunately, this makes me project my incorrect assumptions onto other people and put thoughts into their heads or words into their mouths.

I have been working on this for an entire year, ever since I became aware that I did this. I have made massive amount of progress but it is still a besetting sin and something i need to give to God daily. Because you see it all comes down to fear, self-centeredness, and my desire to be “perfect,” which are all three “biggie” sins. My fear is that people will hate me (I’ve never been one that settled for little fears) or that I will make them mad at me OR I fear that they will not view me as perfect. All of these are interconnected. I don’t try to be too guarded and I try to be honest but usually i only let the “lovable” flaws show. The flaws that I really dislike I try to keep undercover because I fear that people will judge me or dislike me once they know some of my darkest flaws. Wow, I never thought of my perfectionism as a sin before….this is why I love keeping a blog. And isn’t it ridiculous that I don’t want people to seem my flaws? Or that I think they won’t love me if they see my imperfections? What does that say about my view of God and His unconditional love? That might be something I need to evaluate. Hmn.

Anyway, back to my story. Last night, a friend and I were discussing something extremely trivial but it was loosely connected with my inner thought life and projecting things on other people. We were joking around but then he said something that really made me stop and think. He said “you have to get that out of your head” and then went on to explain that what I had been assuming was completely illogical. He didn’t say that exactly but it was the concept. But it was more than what he said, but how he said it. It wasn’t a mean sneer or a condescending comment, but it was a truly concerned and sincere “you are going to drive yourself crazy if you don’t knock this off” statement. It kinda of hit me that after all the advice and other friends hitting me over the head with these simple facts, that it took that statement “you have to get that out of your head” to really make me stop and consider the craziness of my inner monologue and assinine (I really can’t spell) assumptions. I guess, I wasn’t threatened by what he said. Maybe I trust him. Maybe I’m beginning to learn how to show my ugly imperfections to people. Maybe I’m just growing up and realizing that I have to leave my childish insecurities behind and suck it up. Whatever it is (and who knows if it will actually last,) I have learned that I shouldn’t be afraid of my friends. They can actually teach you things if you let them.

I don’t know if this makes any sense but I really learned something last night. I learned that if you let down your guard and not be afraid of letting people see your flaws then you can actually learn something.